I’ve been dancing

I received an email from a friend recently, and the subject line came in a form of question. 

Where are you? 

She noticed I have been MIA. 

I haven’t posted on Instagram, or Facebook. I haven’t returned text, phone calls, or emails and I haven’t written or sent out my weekly blog post. 

I responded.

I am still here, friend. 

Taking care of myself by retreating. 

So much pain in the black community.

So much pain in my heart. 

So much guilt from the white community.

Sadness. Silence. Abuse.

Trying to find balance in the midst of it all.

I’m remembering to pause and rest a few minutes in my hammock.

I’m watering my plants.

I’m rewatching Dave Chappelle and Katt Williams stand up comedy.

I’m scrubbing my feet and painting my toenails the vibrant colors of summer.

I’ve been walking.

I’ve been dancing. 

The first week of dancing was hard. 

It felt like my body forgot how to move to the rhythm. 

I turned to Shaggy and Beres Hammonds, Fight this Feeling, 

and tried to let the music go from my ears, down to my heart, my belly, my hips, my feet.

The music moved through me, 

and recently, I found myself dancing without thought. 

My feet remembered the steps, 

And my fingers are remembering the keys.

Slowly, I am finding my voice and responding to 

some text, and returning a few phone calls. 

Rest. Recharge.
♥

Kadine Christie