Finding JOY in Funky Town

I’m in funky town.

The root of my funk is unclear, but I know there are a few contributing factors:

It could be that I’m completely frustrated, exhausted and annoyed with living in chronic pain.

It could be the new hormones I’m trying to slow the growth of endometriosis.

It could quite possibly be this pelvic floor rest – this NO sex for six weeks mess.

And finally, it could be that after two surgeries – one in February, and another in April – I will have to undergo another June 13th.  

Some moments it feels like giant hands are holding my feet and swinging me around and around— at high speed.  And it’s in times like these when the world feels dull, I rest in the words of Anne Lamont: “Life is a dance between dark, light, dark light dim… ”

It is here, in the dark that I reflect on the light. So here are fifteen things that bring me tremendous Joy.

1. Snipping thyme and oregano from my garden- the scent of them on my fingers inspires me to pull out my cast iron pan and make tomato sauce or steam fish.
2. Pouring syrup over hot-from-the-oven Dutch Baby and watching my family savor their first bite.
3. OMG …. my Tea Tree Conditioner makes me want to rub my own face in my hair.
4. Smoothing the wrinkles in my sheet in the morning, and fixing my pillows is a silent promise: “Whatever the day brings, tonight, you get to rest.”
5. Exfoliating wipes gives my face a good clean and the scent that lingers long after is like a lavender lullaby.
6. A great book. One that requires a highlighter or a pen to write my own thoughts in the margins is by far a superior book.
7. Switching off the overhead light, turning on the softness of my lamp, and looking up at the moon from my bedroom window.
8. White bowls and plates are seriously sexy to me (Don’t judge me… We all have OUR thing).
9. The first hour of writing is like getting one’s eye dug out with a dull blade. Getting past what is expected- the weight of other people’s thoughts- and getting to my sweet spot takes a long time. When I do, WRITING IS PURE BLISS.
10. Being home on rainy days, with a full belly and the scent of a Gardenia candle.
11. One and One time with kids in the afternoons. They each need something different and our time together is as unique as their personality.
12. Waking up early, reading for an hour in silence, and falling back to sleep.
13. Sleeping in the nude on soft sheets.
14. Epiphanies. 
15. How green it is… 

Bonus: walking across the street to watch sunset on the beach.

When your world feels dark, what brings you JOY?

Finding JOY

Kadine