New Holes

There are three new holes in my belly.

There are four others –

One from a tubal ligation in 2009

Two from a hysterectomy in 2014

And another from an embolization in 2019.

They have all healed and faded somewhat

And serves as a reminder that Endometriosis is a battle-

The inside and the outside of my belly

is the battleground

In pre-op

Tourniquets choke my arm

long needles burrow beneath my flesh –

hitting bones instead of veins.

I cringe and I cry and

blood trailed down my arm

onto crisp white sheets

In the Operation room

Medicine erase my memories

A machine breathes for me

And a doctor punctures three new holes into my belly.

He searches my insides

And burst a large cyst

Fulgurate Endometriosis

And sliced my ovary from where it attached itself to my bowel.

In the recovery room

a nurse ask about my pain level

scans my name tag 

And inserts the magical potion of pain relief into my IV

Chris smiles at me

And I remember:

 this morning

when we arrived at Sacred Heart Medical, dawn had yet to break.

The sky was charcoal, the moon was half and bright

and a few early birds sang in the trees nearby.

There are three new holes in my belly

but soon, the ache will subside

the wounds will heal

and I will know that

I am a fighter, a survivor and my own damn superhero.

Kadine